Happy New Year my lovelies and apologies for the belated Wishes.
It’s been a bit of a manic time over the past few weeks. But although this is the first post I’ve posted for a few weeks. I have been thinking of y’all!
Unfortunately though, depression has a way of knocking you out of action and concentration. So I have been still been working on stuff. But not been able to focus enough to get it all written down until now.
Happy New Year Everyone!
So after a bumpy start, I’m happy to say that I’m kicking off into a New year feeling Fresh. Now I’m revived and determined as I have never been before. I was never one for New Years resolutions in the past. But this year, I can see things really looking bright.
Having only just accepted myself as Transgender and coming out just under 8 weeks ago, this year really does feel like a fresh start too.
Although I did come out those 8 weeks ago, I did at the time have absolutely no female wardrobe.
So even though I started wearing makeup more and more regular over this time, it has only really been since a couple of weeks ago that i have had enough suitable attire to be able to function full time as a woman.
Unsettled Festive Period
Well, I have to admit, this years festive period did seem to bother me more than it ever has. So it has been quite an emotional time to be honest.
My Parents have never bothered with Christmas for years either, so not going round there for my Christmas dinner has never bothered me. I’m normally just thankful for having a day in bed where i don’t need to get up for anything and usually just chill.
However, this year, I think with just all the family stuff going on around me everywhere just seemed to hammer home the fact that mine were gone and never coming back.
This of course was nothing surprising. I mean after all, this was something I had to accept as part of the ultimatum i faced coming out. Lose my parents? Or remain seriously unhappy and possibly my life, should the third suicide attempt actually work.
But I suppose the reality of some things hits us harder than other things in life. They can often take time for these realities to sink in. Especially, as i have been finding at this stage in my transition which has come with it a lot of verification. Also for the best part really, ,acceptance from everyone I’ve come out to except for my parents. I’m still very much buzzing at breaking down fear barriers and inhibitions on a daily basis.
So, with each new triumph has come a buzz that I guess that everything’s been on a positive roll. Thus making it a bit tougher when you hit the pits, often over something small.
Back To Normal
So, I really have to admit, that I’ve never been so glad too see the back of all the festive stuff ad back to some sort of normality. Although I think that’s unlikely with all this Omnicron palaver. Besides, I don’t really drink alcohol much at all these days. So I just didn’t bother with the New Year Bells at all.
In the old days, people were for too poor and overworked to be able to sit up all night drinking. Neverminded being able to afford it, New Years Parties were a big thing back then. But nowadays you can just go and have a drink whenever you want to.
So what’s the big deal?
Celebrations
Besides, I decided that if was gonna have a new year celebration then it will be on the 6th of the month. That is providing I should pass my Driving Theory Test with the DVSA, which I passed, So I was Pretty Buzzing. As I had to go all the way down to Manchester on the bus I reckoned that it’d be a good time to go out and check some of the Trans friendly pubs. That was pretty good. A local Trans girl I had been in contact with through the TV Chix Website who showed me around.
I have to say though, the Gay Village in Manchester was pretty dead. Beside ourselves I didn’t see any other Trans girls at all. The only Bars we went into were pretty much dead expect for a few Gay male couples.
But really though, wht else wold you expect on a freezing night at the “Back to work week” of the year, especially on a Tursday night. But to be fair, I found the whole expedition from start to finish an amazing experience and a massive confidence boost as its the furthest I’ve been, especially on public Transport and the biggest thing i’ve done since I started my transition and living as a woman full time.
Catastrophe Strikes
So, just as the new year seemed to be off to a flying start and things seemed to be settling down and back to normality, disaster strikes. I get a knock on the door from a neighbor explaining that there’s water pouring from the back of my flat. Right by the foundations where he waste pipe comes out.
Only it wasn’t waste water. It was clean water, indicating that it was obviously coming from a leaking water main below my home. Where the leak was however was anyone’s guess. These old buildings are so ancient with old lead pipes that the leak could be anywhere really.
So, aaas a result, i’ve had builders in all week digging holes all over my flat trying to locate the leaking pipe. They eventually did and finally just got fixed on Friday evening and the floor re-laid.
So, ive been spending all day yesterday and the past couple of evenings slowly putting everything back to where it was and getting the place looking habitable again. The hardest part is unpacking the boxes that you put all the loose things like paperwork and ornaments,etc in.
Have you ever noticed with these things that they always seem to take minutes to pack, but a week to unpack?
Breaking Barriers
So, it certainly has been quite a buzz when it comes to tackling fears since the start of my transition. It seems fear barriers are being broken on a regular basis. A few days ago, I had to go back to my home town the other day to see the doctor. This has been the first time I set foot in that place since way before I started Transitioning. So it was the first time I’ve been there fully femme as myself.
At first I was a little apprehensive as i wasn’t sure how well it would go. But turned out to be another buzz yet again. I also found it rather amusing the amount of people that I’ve known for years that I walked past in the street and they didn’t even recognise me. Hehe. Buzzing some more!
A New Horizon
So, here we are in 2022 and for myself, i am looking forward to a brand set of challenges and goals. I am very determined to accomplish now that i know I’m on the right track having finally found myself at last.
This of course is not something that I expect to be easy. Especially financially, as I have to create and build for myself an entirely new career in some ways. As I have been into digital marketing for the past few years, I have been fortunate enough that I can carry on working at home online as i have been on and off for years and have been full-time for the past couple of years since the beginning of the COVID-19 Pandemic.
But I have had to give up being a singer and musician for a living for a while. Until I can retrain my voice and learn how to sing in such a way that I’m not strengthening my masculine voice. For years I’ve been able to boom out a whole barroom full of drunken tourists without even using a microphone. A great ability for a male folk singer. But not the greatest way of softening your voice. This is what i have been trying my best to do over the past couple of months.
So with the new year, comes a whole new set of challenges. But wouldn’t life be boring without them? So I wish you all the very best for 2022 my lovelies and you will be hearing from me again very soon.
Have a lovely day
Karalyne
Wow, I am so happy that I came across your blog this evening.
You are such an inspiration.
Gosh, I hope you see that about yourself.
Not only are you inspiring, you are also gorgeous! Beautiful picture.
I am So Incredibly impressed by how brave you are to put all of your thoughts down on paper like this during your transition. It’s unfortunate that Society is not at the point where everyone can accept that people are unique and that our differences are what make us beautiful.
I can guarantee you this blog (if it has not already) will literally SAVE someones precious life.
I am sorry you are dealing w/ a leak in your flat, but I believe that sometimes the universe puts annoying issues like that in our path occasionally in an effort to distract us from getting too introspective.
I know it’s annoying, but a maintenance catastrophe is one of the best ways to make a person focus on being present in the present moment. (Sorry if that got a bit deep there! )
Curious, what type of digital Marketing you do? I have an online shop I sell artwork in, as well as a YouTube channel that could really use some professional marketing services.
Let me know and please keep writing.
xo ash
Hi Ash,
Thank you so much for your wonderful compliments. They mean a lot.
It’s an amazing age we are currently living in where we can learn about things like never before – by first hand accounts and not just the Information the censors want you too see through mainstream media. In as many ways as I often feel liberated, I also feel embarrassed at just how uneducated I was in the past and had it not been for the worldwide web, I would most probably be as ignorant to so much.
So, in many ways I feel obliged as a human being to share my story and skills (which I have been on my other websites which I will doubtlessly refer to throughout the course of time here.)
Like yourself, I have also been a Youtuber providing tutorials. This is something I have taken a temporary break from however as i come to terms with myself and my own new image, etc. As a singer/songwriter, I also have a similar situation going on as I sort my voice out.. But i guess its all about learning and adaptation which can be as fun as you make it.
Yeah, the leaking water pipe was bit of an upheaval, but it sorta gave me a kick up the ass like you mention and made me have a rid out of all the junk that i’d been planning on doing “tomorrow” for so long. lolz
As for digital marketing, I run numerous websites and many other bits n pieces that are all little faucets of income. A mix of both eCommerce and Affiliate Marketing. This is something I started around 14 years ago as a hobby, as I was engrossed and fascinated by how you could make money online. Over the years, it grew o become a seasonal Income but has moved to a full-time occupation in the past couple of years since the Global Covid Pandemic struck.
I was actually thinking at some point soon here, I might write up a short Free course that teaches others how they can build their own website or blog. Feel Free to contact me with your site if you like hun and i can give it a look n see if I can give you any pointers (not promising as itmight be alreadybetter than anything i’ve ever done. Lolz)
Now that things are back to as normal as they’ve ever been, you will be hearing from me more often on here now that I have more time again to write.
Have a great day hun
Thanks
Karalyne
I appreciate the welcome of the new year via your site. You seemed to have faced a lot of adversity going into this new year, and are very transparent about it, however, you’re remaining optimistic about the future moving forward which is very important. I hope you’re able to take the situations you had to experience going into this 2022 year and use them as “reference lessons” to conquer the next task. Have a great rest of your new year!
Thank you very much.
yes, I guess the Academy of Life is all about learning not only from our mistakes and downsides, but also recognizing our acheivements and our own positive assets as well.
Have a great 2022
Thanks
Karalyne
I think life would be boring without challenges. At challenging times, I certainly don’t think positively but they do make life interesting. We learn from them, we grow, we get stronger. Lots of positives from the daily happenings in our life. I would not have been too happy to find out there was a water leak under or around my house. That would have been challenging for sure!
Hi Leah, yeah I have to say ” It had it’s moments” but it is what it is as they as say and all you can do is get on with it. But its very true what you say, there is so much positivity you can take from each bad situation. Serendipity huh.
Have a great day hun
Karalyne
Karalyne, thank you for sharing your wonderful journey! I am sorry to hear that you parents are not in the win column yet, but give it time. Patience is truly a virtue. Will all brought 2022 in with some type of burden on our shoulders, feel free to continue peeling the layers back and finding what makes you happy. You will undoubtable thank yourself later. Enjoy you new beginning and I hope you get that singing voice together soon.
Thank you very much. That means a lot hun. Wishing you all the very best too for 2022.
Yes, thats exactly what I plan on doing. IT was almost the end of last year that I only made the discovery and accepted myself as Transgender, so 2022 is gonna be entirely about self discovery and feelig healthier for it all the time.
Unfortunately with my parents, I dont think time will do much really, as they are boxed into their own trap. This is what comes with standing on a soapbox finger pointing for years I guess. But it is what it is and something I fully expected as ive known for for many years (in fact, all my life) their views on the matter
But I cant let other peoples (no matter who they are) intolranvce be my problem any more. Not when it was affecting my health the way it was.
Thanks for your comment hun and have a great day!
Karalyne!
I feel something very special in this article. Also, it reveals the way your niche behaves within the content. Also, I feel this is truly motivational and a kind of brave and honest effort towards life.
I truly understand writing the emotions is a kind of relieving tablet for the soul. you have done that wonderfully through this article. I really enjoyed your very specified blog and honest self-thoughts towards life.I really felt that you are seeing shining positive glamour in your future.
I wish all the very best for your b log and life
Thank you very much dear. That means a lot. Yes, it can often be challenging as much as it can be releivig to document feelings,emotions, thoughts and life in general. But i’m a strong beleiver in communication and namely the internet has a massive patrt to play but can solve so many of the worlds problems not just on large scale uissues, but i feel so many people can benefit and grow on a personal level thanks to the shaarng of such information. So I like to do my bit, as afterall, I may not have discovered my true self had it not been for others sharing their own thoughts and opinions as well as feelings and experiences.
Have a great day
Karalyne!
Hey there.
Thank you so much for the kind compliments and wishes.
Likewise, I wish you all the very best in your own path.
Have a lovely weekend
Karalyne
Having read this I believed it was very informative. I appreciate you finding the time and effort to put this information together. I once again find myself spending way too much time both reading and posting comments. But so what, it was still worth it!
Im glad you found it to be informative
Thank you
Thank You!
I’m ever so glad that you found this to be informative.
I enjoy writing as much as I can too and like to educate people on a lot of the matters discussed here on my website. I guess I wouldnt have discovered my own gender if it wasnt for others writing informative articles. So you’re most welcome and I’d be happy to answer any questions anyone may have.
Like yourself, I love reading, writing and commenting but you can never have too much of any of these.
Have a wonderful day!
Karalyne